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A legacy to Uphold

My dad passed away on 17th May, 2007. Death, is a norm, no matter how ironical it might be.

Little did I expect that the day he sent me to the train station boarding for Kuala Lumpur a few weeks back was the last time I will ever saw him breathing. Consider myself lucky, since some of my brothers and sisters last saw him a few months earlier before they continue pursuing their studies.

Little did everyone expect to see him gone at such a young age (57 is still young, you know). Minus smoking (he was an avid smoker until year 2005, after he went for Haj’), he led a healthy lifestyle. My dads’ pastime was filled with planting fruit trees, gardening and related stuff. In fact, he looked very healthy that deep in me, I am looking forward to see him playing with my children in the future.

That fateful night, I got a call from my aunt. Well, I called her to be exact because at 2.00 a.m., I was really curious why on earth did my phone got almost 5 missed calls? She was brief,”Fuqaha, your dad is gone”. I did not cry, nor did my feet go shaking, ready to tumble. I asked her on the cause of death (heart attack), praying that his death is smooth and with all God’s Mercy and His blessings.

I only cried sometime later, when I was back at my room, being alone, reminiscing almost every moment that my memories can go. I cried, not because of his death, but because I almost never give him any appreciation of what he has done to us. I cried, because I seldom call home to say a simple Hi. I cried because I never took any picture of us being together.

I cried, for not trying to be a good son.

I catch a 10.30 MAS Flight (Air Asias’ fully booked). However, I failed to be at home on time and witness him before my eyes, and taking part for the ‘Prayers for the dead’ session. From the airport, my uncle brought straight back to the cemetery and the Imam opened the kafan (cotton closure) for me to see him one last time. I gave him my last goodbye kiss. I couldn’t cry, as my eyes already dry.

So as most of my siblings, we are seldom at home. The big boys and big girls went to boarding schools and universities, only to be at home during semester break. Our quality time is not anywhere near your family’s quality time. During holidays, my dad will always bring us to our orchards and let us serve the land. Well, we went all the way from planting trees, seeding and up to the best part, plucking the fruits.

You might be surprised to know that I have a very large family consisting of 26 siblings from 3 moms (my 2nd mom, Umie Nah passed away on year 2000 due to cancer, which left us with 2 moms now). Polygamy, at least in my family is beautiful. I can easily say that those broadcasted movies / films show a very bad image on the term polygamy. Our family bond is very close. When I was young, my dad always brought me to my other two moms and I always love to have a sleepover at their houses.

Aboh, I love you.

For any Muslim who read this, I sincerely hope for an alFatihah for my dad. Amin.

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9 Comments



Artgeex May 23, 2007 Votes: +0	alfatihah untuk ayah fuqaha. tapi u dont worry. i believe, kasih sayang tu tak perlu ko nyatakan dalam bentuk ayat mahupun gambar. deep down in your heart, kalau ada perasaan kasih sayang tu ( aku sure ada) pasti akan sampai kat parents kau, dan mereka dapat rasakan dan tau ko sayang mereka. dan imho, kasih sayang yang semacam itu yang lebih berharga. report abuse vote down vote up


flisterz May 23, 2007 http://www.flisterz.com Votes: +0	alfatihah. sori to hear this. semoga ko terus tabah. aku ckup bangga ko dpt hadapi ni dengan baik sekali. aku x mungkin dpt buat mcm tu. aku pn since form1 dok hostel. sangat sikit mase bersama keluarga. takziah to u n your family. btw i love d new design. ur really good bout this joomla thing. huhu report abuse vote down vote up


Fuqaha May 23, 2007 Votes: +0	hi Artgeex and flisterz. Thanks for the supportive comments. I really appreciate it. report abuse vote down vote up


teddybearhijo May 24, 2007 Votes: +0	qaha, moga ko tabah2 slalu. al fatihah gag tok ayah ko. stay happy deh... tak besh tgk ko muram2... i know, its hard, tp jgn dok manyak ngat pikir pasal apa yg ko kesalkan... arwah pon musti tanak tgk ko sedey2 kan... ako doakan ko, arwah, sentiasa bawah rahmat Die... manyak2 doa ke Die deh... tata... (^^)" report abuse vote down vote up


Puteri May 24, 2007 http://shesputeri.diaryland.com Votes: +0	Fuqaha, alfatihah for your late father. I am very sorry for your loss... and trust me, I can relate to that feeling of sudden emptiness.. and sometimes regrets over things that could have been. BUT, at times like these, the most important thing to do is pray. remember that if indeed you want to help you father or show your appreciation NOW. the only way is through your prayers. that'll ALWAYS reach him =) remember the good times, remember the things that you did right, and remember his advices which he gave.. and fulfill them if you havent already. I believe you must've been a good son.. and you can still be that good, even better son now. Hang in there, fuqaha. Allah have His reasons for everything that happens. Let this be something to make you stronger, inside. =) - Puteri. report abuse vote down vote up


ayol May 25, 2007 Votes: +0	fuqaha al-fatihah report abuse vote down vote up


anwari May 26, 2007 http://www.anwarii.com/ Votes: +0	sabar ye fuqaha.. sesuatu yang hilang pasti ada yang sebabnya.. aku harap kau dapat menghadapinya dengan baik.. takziah to you and your family alFatihah report abuse vote down vote up


sawak May 26, 2007 Votes: +0	i'm sorry for your lost... report abuse vote down vote up


azwanhadzree May 27, 2007 http://azwanhadzree.com/ Votes: +0	I m sorry for your lost. Takziah aku ucapkan. If you cant be a good son when he is alive, be one now. report abuse vote down vote up

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